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3 Powerful Ways to Overcome Challenges in Life

Updated: February 17, 2021 by Gavril Nikolaev Leave a Comment

At some point, you’ll find yourself in an impossible situation.

Maybe, you’re facing it right now.

You don’t know what to do and can’t let go of worry and fear.

It’s precisely these moments when we need guidance to help us find a way out.

The good news is you always have three options to overcome challenges in life, and one of them will always work for you.

I first learned about them from the book The Power of Now, written by spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle.

In this post, I want to share these three powerful ways to deal with any obstacles that life puts before you.
Woman with open arms in the sunset with text overlay: 3 Powerful Ways to Overcome Challenges in Life

#1. The first thing you need to try

Every day we face a number of different situations. Most of them can be unpleasant or downright intolerable.

We all have different ways of dealing with them, but very often, we do nothing and repress our feelings. This builds up over time and causes stress.

Eckhart Tolle teaches us that the first thing we can is to try to change the situation, if possible.

But the action shouldn’t come from the place of negativity. It should come from a clear understanding of where you are and what choices you have at this very moment to overcome challenges.

Action arising out of insight into what is required is more effective than action arising out of negativity. — Eckhart Tolle

#2. If the first one doesn’t work

If you tried to change the situation, but nothing worked, then consider the second option — to remove yourself from it.

For example, how often do you find yourself arguing with someone who is clearly not going to change their mind?

When you catch yourself in this unconscious behavior, take a step back, and reconsider everything. Then walk away if you feel that nothing you say or do will result in a positive outcome.

Any action is often better than no action, especially if you have been stuck in an unhappy situation for a long time. If it is a mistake, at least you learn something, in which case it’s no longer a mistake. If you remain stuck, you learn nothing. — Eckhart Tolle

#3. The hardest of the three

Sometimes we are trapped in a situation that we have absolutely no control of.

That means you can’t do anything to change the situation or remove yourself from it.

It’s the point of complete surrender and acceptance of what is. But don’t confuse it with giving up.

Acceptance doesn’t mean that you resign yourself and say, “It’s all pointless.” On the contrary, you accept this moment without complaining or judging.

You allow your inner stillness to manifest fully and, by doing so, regain peace and clear your mind.

The false, unhappy self that loves feeling miserable, resentful, or sorry for itself can then no longer survive. This is called surrender. Surrender is not weakness. There is great strength in it. Only a surrendered person has spiritual power. Through surrender, you will be free internally of the situation. You may then find that the situation changes without any effort on your part. In any case, you are free. — Eckhart Tolle

#4. The one thing you want to avoid doing

Right now, you might be asking, “What if I don’t like any of these three options?”

Well, that’s a fair question, and the answer can help you make up your mind.

If you don’t want to change the situation, walk away, or accept it, then the only option you have is to suffer.

That’s what happens to most of us when we try to overcome challenges in life. And it doesn’t matter how big or small the problems are. In the end, they all add up and result in what we call unhappiness.

I remember Eckhart Tolle mentioning this fourth option during one of his talks and immediately thought, “That’s what I have been doing for the most of my life.”

Choose the Right Option Today

Whenever you hear a critical voice in your head that can’t forgive or compromise, always remember about the three options you have.

Don’t let your thoughts and emotions take over and practice being an impartial observer of the situation.

Remember, you can always change, leave, or accept any challenging situation. The only other choice is suffering.

I believe you can make the right choice.

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Since I started this website 3 years ago my only aim was and still remains helping all of my readers to discover the path to inner calm through spiritual growth and cultivation of wisdom. I spend all of my time working on this project and your support plays a vital role in allowing me to improve and make this website an invaluable resource for everyone. If my little virtual home uplifted your spirit or made your day a little bit better, please consider donating to support its further growth.

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Three Types of Meditation Distractions and How to Deal with Them

Updated: February 17, 2021 by Gavril Nikolaev Leave a Comment

Is it hard for you to meditate even for 3 minutes?

Do you get interrupted by noises, physical discomfort, or even your thoughts?

If you do, then here is what you need to know: these meditation distractions are part of the process.

And the hardest thing you will learn to do is become comfortable with them.

Why am I confident in your success? Because I went through that stage myself.

Looking back, all I can remember is irritation and disappointment.

Prolonged sitting stirred memories from my past that I learned to push away, and it wasn’t what I wanted.

But in the end, it did help me let go of the things that were burdening my mind.

Meditation allowed me to observe my thoughts without judgment. I was able to focus on the now, the only thing that truly mattered.

So in this post, I will share the three most common meditation distractions and how to deal with them.

Yellow leaf in the sun with text overlay: 3 Types of Meditation Distractions and How to Deal with Them

Irritating Noises

Can you meditate to the sound of the pigs?

If you’re wondering why I’m bringing up the pigs, here’s a story behind it.

I’m a part of a meditation group, and one day a member posted a question on behalf of a friend who lived on a farm.

This friend wanted to meditate, but pig noises interfered with his concentration. So he wanted to know what he should do about it.

The right answer to that question is two-fold.

First, you have to take the right action. Do whatever you can to find a quiet place. However, sometimes it’s easier said than done.

If there is no practical way to get rid of the distracting sound, you need to get comfortable with it.

Observe your internal reactions and let them uncover your habitual thought patterns.

As you practice more, you might notice that the noise doesn’t really bother you anymore. So whether you meditate in total silence or with pigs around won’t make any difference.

Do you live in a noisy environment? How do you deal with it when you want to meditate?

Physical Discomfort

So you are trying to sit still, but your body wants to move. And on top of that, it seems like forever because time has stopped.

In my experience, this irritating feeling can be linked to physical discomfort.

One way to deal with this meditation distraction is to adjust your sitting meditation posture.

For example, many people start with a cross-legged position on the floor.

I do not recommend this approach because it does more harm than good. If you’re not flexible enough, you might feel tense and uneasy.

The best option is to sit on a chair, placing feet firmly on the ground and arms on the lap.

This way, you will keep your body relaxed, and your mind alert for meditation.

Related: 3 Relaxing Meditation Postures for Beginners

Distracting Thoughts

Does it seem impossible to keep out distracting thoughts when you meditate?

Only a few minutes into meditation and a random image from your past shutters your concentration. And when that happens, you blame yourself for not being able to meditate the right way.

As this keeps happening, you consider dropping meditation because it doesn’t work.

If you ever felt that way, then you had been doing everything right. Becoming aware of your thoughts is one of the main benefits of meditation.

For example, when you count your out-breaths during breathing meditation and get distracted, you have to start all over again. Only then can you move on to the next stage of the technique.

In the long run, this repetition helps your mind let go of thoughts and go back to your breath. You learn to “catch” your thoughts, becoming aware of something that was unconscious.

So there are two components at work here:

1. You notice that you are being distracted by a thought

2. You go back to your breath

Related: How to Practice Breathing Meditation in 4 Easy Steps

The moment you notice the distraction is the moment you create a small gap between you and your thought.

That gap means that you can “see” the thought from a distance. You break your identification with it. You become the observer.

This gap is tiny at first, but with time it expands, and your concentration improves.

It becomes much easier to follow your breath and come back to it whenever you want.

This practice profoundly changes your everyday life. Even when not meditating, you can catch yourself thinking negative thoughts. Your awareness grows, and with it, your ability to remain calm and take the right action.

Donate & Support

Since I started this website 3 years ago my only aim was and still remains helping all of my readers to discover the path to inner calm through spiritual growth and cultivation of wisdom. I spend all of my time working on this project and your support plays a vital role in allowing me to improve and make this website an invaluable resource for everyone. If my little virtual home uplifted your spirit or made your day a little bit better, please consider donating to support its further growth.

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Filed Under: Spirituality

Understanding Buddhism: The Second Noble Truth

Updated: February 27, 2021 by Gavril Nikolaev Leave a Comment

“So long, monks, as my knowledge and vision of these Four Noble Truths as they really are (…) was not thoroughly purified in this way, I did not claim to have awakened to the unsurpassed perfect enlightenment.” — the Buddha.

The Four Noble Truths are often believed to be the introductory teaching of Buddhism, but it’s a misconception for to fully understand the Four Noble Truths is to attain full enlightenment, as the Buddha said in his first discourse Setting the Wheel of Dhamma in Motion (the Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta).

The four noble truths are reminiscent of a medical formula, and the Buddha himself is compared to a great physician. Just as the doctor diagnoses the patient and prescribes the medicine, the Buddha pinpoints humanity’s ailment and prescribes the treatment to overcome it.

As such, the first noble truth diagnoses the affliction, the second noble truth reveals its origin, the third noble truth points to the cure, and the fourth noble truth shows the way to the cure.

Contemplating Buddhist monk with text overlay: Understanding Buddhism: the Second Noble Truth

This is how the Buddha defined the Second Noble of Truth (Craving):

The Noble Truth of the origin of suffering is this: It is this thirst (craving) which produces re-existence and re-becoming, bound up with passionate greed. It finds fresh delight now here and now there, namely, thirst for sense-pleasures; thirst for existence and becoming; and thirst for non-existence.

Here’s a talk given by Ven. Bhikkhu Bodhi on the Second Noble Truth of Buddhism:

Mindful Spot · Ven. Bhikkhu Bodhi on the Second Noble Truth of Buddhism

From the Buddha’s definition of the Second Noble Truth, we can see that he’s looking deeply at the underlying root of all forms of Dukkha (suffering). And what he’s doing is not just pointing out the outer signs but looking at the underlying cause of suffering.

Sometimes the Pali word Tanha (Sanskrit: Trishna) is translated as desire, but that is somewhat misleading because there can be good and bad desire in Buddhism. So the more accurate English word would be craving — a thirst to swallow up things and absorb them into oneself as the basis of one’s own identity.

When the Buddha analyzes the nature of craving, he distinguishes three types of craving.

The first type is craving sensual pleasure through the eye, ear, nose, tongue, and body. We crave beautiful forms, delightful sounds, fragrant odors, delicious food, and pleasant bodily sensations, all of which stimulate our minds.

The second type is craving continued existence. This craving manifests most prominently in clinging to the five aggregates of attachment: body, feelings, perceptions, volitions, and consciousness. These five constituents form what we believe to be our true “self.” This craving for existence is what ultimately drives the stream of consciousness into a new manifestation after the death of our physical body: rebirth and new incarnation. And in this way, the craving can be understood as the dynamic force that drives the cycle of rebirths.

The third type is craving for non-existence, which is very hard to comprehend. At first glance, it may seem to imply a craving that drives someone to end his own life, but it’s never explained in the Buddhist texts in that way. If we attempt to interpret its meaning, then we could say that it’s a repulsion to existence and refusal to continue in the cycle of rebirths, desire to cease to exist after death, nothing else after that.

Furthermore, there are two ways in which craving functions as the cause of Dukkha: psychological and meta-psychological.

The psychological aspect can be seen in how we crave for something that we don’t have. For example, we might want to buy a new expensive smartphone because we don’t like the one we have. First, we have to struggle to get the money to buy one. Then, we get the money and buy the new phone, and we feel amazing; there is a delight of possession. But then comes another form of Dukkha which manifests in anxious concern for our new phone. We are worried that it might break down, get lost, or be stolen; we experience the anxiety of possession. Then, with time our new phone gets old and out-of-date. We see our friends with new phones, and we don’t like our phone anymore, and we want to buy a new one. And so the cycle continues endlessly.

The meta psychological aspect is the craving that creates attachment to the five aggregates which, after the breakdown of our physical body at the moment of death, drive the stream of consciousness into a new existence and perpetuate the round of birth and death. This aspect shows the deep existential relationship between craving and Dukkha.

Donate & Support

Since I started this website 3 years ago my only aim was and still remains helping all of my readers to discover the path to inner calm through spiritual growth and cultivation of wisdom. I spend all of my time working on this project and your support plays a vital role in allowing me to improve and make this website an invaluable resource for everyone. If my little virtual home uplifted your spirit or made your day a little bit better, please consider donating to support its further growth.

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Mindful Spot has a free weekly newsletter where I share my findings across Buddhism, philosophy, literature, art, and other sources that allow us to expand our inner world and feel greater connection to each other. Subscribe below:
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Filed Under: Buddhism

How to Be in the Now and Have Future Goals

Updated: February 17, 2021 by Gavril Nikolaev Leave a Comment

“How can I have future goals and live in the present moment at the same time?”

If you’ve been asking yourself this question, you might be under the impression that being in the now excludes any goal-setting and thoughts of the future.

On the surface, the teachings of modern spiritual teachers like Eckhart Tolle can make you believe that there is nothing but the present moment.

You might also think mastering the art of living in the now requires you to drop all thoughts about past and future.

But these things don’t exclude one another. You can (and should) practice them together for a happy and fulfilling life.

In this article, I’m going to show you how you can be present and have future goals without any worry or stress.
A man's hand reaching to a bird in the sky with text overlay: How to Be in the Now and Have Future Goals

Escape the Trap of Psychological Time

The first step is to understand the difference between psychological time and clock time.

The psychological time traps you in never-ending regret about the past and worries about the future.

Let’s say you’re having dinner with your family. You smile, look happy and engage in small talk, but your thoughts are elsewhere.

In your mind, you keep going back to that important project that you’ve been on working on for months. You worry that without your complete attention it’s going to fail.

Then you imagine what would happen if it does fail. All the hours and money you put into making it happen will be wasted, and you’ll have to start over or come up with a new idea.

Can you see how insane this is?

By immersing yourself in negative thoughts, you made the worst-case scenario a reality. In your head, you already failed. And on top of that, you feel all associated negative emotions.

To escape the trap of psychological time you need to use clock time. Which brings up to the next point.

Do The Only Thing You Can Do Right Now

The opposite of psychological time is the clock time. Here’s how it works.

When you use clock time, you are living in the present but peripherally aware of your past and future.

You know what happened to you in the past, but it doesn’t affect your life now.

You have a goal and want to achieve it, but you’re not imagining what might go wrong.

Instead, you know where you are right now and what you need to do.

Being present doesn’t mean that you dismiss logical thinking and common sense.

For example, if you know that there may be some challenges on the way to your goal you realize that fully. You do not live in denial.

By being aware of the obstacles and challenges, you are taking the right action now.

It may be that the only action you can take now is to plan. Then make a plan, do what you have to do in the present circumstances.

Related: 7 Simple Ways to Get Better at Single-Tasking

Take One Step at a Time

Making an action plan can pull you into the “prediction mode” where you start thinking about all the things. Don’t let your mind do that.

Take a deep breath, let the planning flow from an inner state of calm and presence.

In this very moment, you are where you are supposed to be. You do not need to hurry or prove anything to anyone.

Write down all the tasks that you need to do. Put them on your calendar, set reminders, and rest in the knowledge that everything will be accomplished in its own time.

Then start going towards your goal by taking one step at a time. Each step will be fully rooted in the present moment, and any action arising out of it will be powerful and intentional.

Donate & Support

Since I started this website 3 years ago my only aim was and still remains helping all of my readers to discover the path to inner calm through spiritual growth and cultivation of wisdom. I spend all of my time working on this project and your support plays a vital role in allowing me to improve and make this website an invaluable resource for everyone. If my little virtual home uplifted your spirit or made your day a little bit better, please consider donating to support its further growth.

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Mindful Spot has a free weekly newsletter where I share my findings across Buddhism, philosophy, literature, art, and other sources that allow us to expand our inner world and feel greater connection to each other. Subscribe below:
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