It’s very hard to notice but we have a very persistent critical voice that lives in our heads. And the strangest thing is that we let it be there all the time. Not a day goes by without it trying to criticize, blame, and judge us or other people around us. I started to notice this unconscious tendency in myself after starting my meditation practice and in this post, I would like to share some tips that I use myself which might help in using mindfulness to stop negative thoughts.

The first step is to notice our negative thoughts whenever possible. But this is very hard to do when we live on autopilot, immersed in our daily activities. We hardly ever have time to just stop and be aware of what’s going on in our heads.

For example, during one of the darker periods of my life I used to wake up with a heavy feeling every morning. All daily routine activities seemed pretty much meaningless: getting off the bed, brushing my teeth, putting on the clothes, eating breakfast, going to work. Looking back, I now see how negative thoughts about doing all these things were making me unhappy. It might sound strange, but I wasn’t really aware of these thoughts at that time because my subconscious mind masked them as “normal” and “mundane.”

There are two common mind traps that we need to avoid when trying to be aware of our negative thoughts. One is trying to control or suppress them. I remember telling myself, “Just stop thinking about it and it will go away.” That didn’t work because the more I tried to stop my thoughts the more they proliferated in my mind. Another trap is trying to think positive thoughts. So instead of thinking about how I hated my job at the time, I would think about the money I was making and how it helped me buy more stuff. The sad truth about this is that we can’t always think positive thoughts no matter how hard we try. When it seems like trying times are finally over something else comes up and makes us unhappy.

The second step is finding triggers or things that push our buttons. The best way to do that is to be alert during the day and try to notice negative emotions and reactions to specific activities, places, or people. We can think about it as a chain that first starts with a thought which leads to an emotion that, in turn, leads to a reaction. Most of the time, we’re not aware of the first link in this chain (the thought). By pinpointing specific triggers, we can become more conscious of things that serve as a cause of negativity in our lives.

The third step is to learn to accept our thoughts. Even though this might sound simple, the act itself is not. I would describe it as being comfortable with every negative thought that pops up in our heads and letting go of the need to label it in any way. When we put a conscious effort to be with our negative thoughts, with time we come to realize that they’re not that threatening. They’re just thoughts.

The final step is to disidentify from our thoughts. We can think of it as creating distance between ourselves and our thoughts. Here’s a simple mental exercise that I use to work with my own negative thoughts. First, whenever a criticism or self-judgment pops up in my mind, I mentally repeat it to myself, for example, “I can’t do anything right.” Then I change it to, “I think I can’t do anything right.” And lastly, I rephrase it to “I’ve noticed I have a thought that I can’t do anything right.” Doing this allows me to see thoughts as thoughts, to create a “mental distance” so to speak. Thanks to this process thoughts lose their power to draw me in completely, and I become more aware of my thinking patterns. As a supplement, I created this free worksheet available through the link below.

Choosing the right meditation posture when you’re just starting out can make or break your meditation practice. What you usually see in images with people sitting in a lotus pose is not how you want to start meditating. That pose requires a great deal of flexibility and training to execute correctly. If misused it can significantly hinder your progress and potentially turn you off from sitting meditation altogether. It is essential to feel comfortable and relaxed when attempting to do meditation for the first time. You need to start with a familiar posture that can be maintained for 10 or 20 minutes, especially if you’re not sure how long to meditate. In this post, I’ll describe 3 meditation postures you can try and experiment with as you choose the most convenient one that works for you.

Meditation Posture #1 – Sitting on a Chair

The key to getting most out of this simple posture is to make sure that when you sit your hips are slightly higher than your knees. This ensures that your pelvis is tilted forward to support a natural curvature of your spine that will help you sit straight and unsupported. Do not lean against the backrest and sit closer to the edge of your seat. If necessary, use a cushion or a pillow to bring your hips over the knees to prevent slouching. Throughout sitting meditation, you should maintain a straight back and keep your head in line with your spine. Place your feet flat on the floor and hands on the thighs, palms down or up. Alternatively, you can fold your arms on your lap.

Meditation Posture #2 – Kneeling

If you don’t like sitting on a chair then kneeling with support might be a better option. Kneeling posture has the advantage of the stability of the floor and the tilt of the pelvis which helps you keep your back straight. There are two ways you can sit in this pose: without support on your heels or with a kneeling bench or a pillow. For starters, I recommend placing a pillow or two between your legs and sit down. Don’t put too much pressure on your knees. If it starts to hurt, choose another posture.

Meditation Posture #3 – Lying Down

Finally, if none of the sitting postures work for you, then you can meditate lying down. Just lie down on a firm, soft surface with your arms at your sides and palms facing upwards. Your feet should be placed apart on the floor with the knees up and not touching each other. One drawback to this posture is that you can easily fall asleep if you try to use it in the evening. Because of this, it’s best to use it in the mornings when you’re still full of energy.

Ultimately, there is not one right way to do it. You can practice sitting meditation in any posture that you feel most comfortable for you. I suggest experimenting with different postures and getting a feel for how each one affects your concentration level. The best position will cause you minimal physical discomfort and allow you to meditate for more extended periods of time. If you feel pain or extreme discomfort during meditation stop using that posture and choose something different. To help, I made this free worksheet that you can download by clicking the button below.

Hi! I’m Gavril, and in this post I’m going to talk about why I started this mindfulness blog.

In early 2014 my back problems lead me to yoga, but it ended up helping me in a much better way. A deep calming effect experienced during Shavasana sparked my interest in meditation. It wasn’t long before I started practicing it daily, and it pretty much snowballed from there.

By applying mindfulness in everyday life and observing my thoughts, I was able to see the root of my unhappiness and dissatisfaction with life. Specifically, that all of it was created by negative thought loops playing in my head. Since then, I’ve been exploring what it means to live a mindful and more meaningful life, and I hope you will join me.

Why Start a Mindfulness Blog?

I believe that no matter how complicated or stressful our life is, it’s always possible to find peace and clarity, right here and now. Awareness developed by daily meditation practice can give us the strength to overcome even the hardest challenges in life.

This blog also gives me a chance to reach a lot of people around the world. It’s a perfect opportunity to share my experience and knowledge to help them get started on their own path.

Who Am I Writing for?

Many people could benefit from the information I post here, but I mainly write for those who are very new to mindfulness. They are interested but don’t know where to start. Or they’ve tried meditation but have trouble with concentration and consistency. They feel like they need more guidance and someone who would point them in the right direction.

I can help them take their first step towards mindfulness: from understanding how it can change their life to learning the best techniques and practices.

How Can You Get More Involved With This Blog?

I want to make this a very interactive website where you not only read but actively participate in the discussion. I highly encourage you to leave comments on the articles that you found interesting or helpful.

Before I wrap this up, I invite you to subscribe and join my community to get exclusive content and stories only shared with my subscribers.